I wanna play

--Post a memory of me as a comment for this entry. It can be anything you want, maybe your first, maybe your favorite. Then post this in your Xanga and see what people remember about you.--

Take a deep breath.
Four More days.
Take a deep breath.
And Work.

I hate this week....for some reason when I need to be the most productive I am the laziest. Why does the world of school hate me?

I've realized that going out and partying can satisfy three things: drinking, partying and hooking up with random guys. I enjoy the first two events on that list...but for some reason everyone thinks that if you're doing the first two, then you want the last one. And the thing is that I'm both very flirty and very in love. Those two things don't work together...but instead against one another, as expected. But now I almost feel as though going out really isn't worth it. I mean, yeah it's nice to go out with the girls. But when I used to go out with the girls it'd be like, we were all together until each of us met our "guy". And now I have no desire to find a guy. I can see though what I used to look for. hAnd I love it. I have no desire to have random hook ups and be with anyone but Craig...but then comes the factor of people thinking that if I"m drinking and dancing then they think I want to hook up.

Basically.....going out really isn't all its cracked up to be. I think I would rather be falling asleep with Craig. Going out isnt how I'm gonna meet my friends. So whats the point?

Goodnight.

Today has been such a good day! Normally holidays are sorta "eh" for me. I mean, I love my family but it's usually nothing really big. But now that my brother and I have gotten older and we don't see each other that often we have a really good time together when we are around one another. We didn't really even do anything, we were both just really goofy. I think that I like it so much because my brother thinks I'm sorta funny now. See, I used to always have this complex like, "why am I not funny? why does my brother get to be the funny one of the family? I want to impress my brother!" And now, I'm still not really funny, persay. But I make my brother laugh...and it makes me feel good. I think its more that I'm goofy. Plus we like to make fun of my mom together (which really isn't as mean as it may sound---we love her dearly) so we have that common laughing point. Its just nice to feel like we're sorta at the same place in our lives and have a good time together.

Now, to top off my good day I'm off to lay in bed and watch as many episodes of The West Wing as humanly possible---or at least until I fall asleep.

Much Love.